Recently I've found it necessary to cultivate a collection of animal bones.
Did you know that you can get ten pounds of bones from the butcher for ten dollars? And the bones are not clean, they're still full of meat which you can totally use for some sort of meat pie or something. Hello marvelous way to save money! I call it Mystery Meat Pie! Now if I could just find someone to eat it...
Why am I collecting bones, you ask? Well, let me assure you it's all in the name of art. More on that later.
But first, a lesson about the proper way to clean bones.
1. Place bones in a large pot for boiling.
2. Boil bones for several days. Enjoy the aroma of cooking carcass. Mmmm, carcass!
3. Rinse and scrub the bones using a strong brush. Make sure you get all of the marrow off. And those fun squishy bits!
4. Place clean bones on a cooking tray and place them in the sun to bleach. I'd recommend placing them somewhere in your yard where they will be in full view of most of your neighbors. It will certainly give you all something to talk about at the next block party.
I will say that after boiling and cleaning a cow's femur, I felt pretty badass. I mean no one's gonna mess with the bone cleaner...right?